Attention parents of teenagers. This post is for you. Your child is constantly TXTing and Emailing and shit. They are always using these abbreviations that are called INTERNET SPEAK. What does it all mean? No worries, we here at FuckThatBand.com are here to uncover all the secrets. We cracked the code so you don't have to! Here are the most common ones you can expect your son/daughter using:

*IDK - I don't know
*LOL - Laughing out loud
*IWTFMM - I want to fuck my mom
*IWTFMD - I want to fuck my dentist
*TTNYS - This Time Next Year Sucks
*WTF - What the fuck
*IKR - I know right
*YRLLTTNY - You are lame like This Time Next Year
*LMAO - Laughing my ass off
*ROFL - Rolling on [the] floor laughing
*OSGGFMB - One second, gotta go finger my butt
*ROFLMAO - Rolling on [the] floor laughing my ass off
*WGSTTNYPTJKTS - Wanna go see This Time Next Year play tonight, just kidding they suck
*ILY - I love you
*STFU - Shut the fuck up
*OMG - Obama my god

So there you have it, parents. Now you will never feel like your kids are pulling a "fast one" on you EVER AGAIN. Fuckin' teenagers. Who do they think they are!? Little wieners with their little wiener laptops/iPhones. Fuck them! 55 is the new 21 am I right?

Tomorrow is New Years Eve. R U ready? Hope so. Do you have regrets? Sure you do, I do. I regret renewing my 2 year plan with Verizon, that means I can't get an iPhone because only AT&T does the whole iPhone thing. Shit man. What am I going to do? I heard all the cool kids have iPhones. Remember when all the cool kids had those Motorola RAZR phones? Those are lame now, almost as lame as This Time Next Year. You hear those dudes yet? Ughhhhhhhhhhhh.

Enough talking about shitty phones and shitty bands; more talk about 2008. It was a good year, finally lost my virginity. College is cool like that, girls just don't care. I wuz at a FRAT party getting my FRAT on and I totally scored with this one chick. She was totally ugly (fug-lee for realz), that was kinda a turn off but ya know, whatever, COLLEGE ROCKS. She was wearing a This Time Next Year shirt, that was kinda a turn off but ya know, whatever, COLLEGE ROCKS. She threw up in my mouth while we were French kissing, that was kinda a turn off but ya know, whatever, COLLEGE ROCKS. I got my bone on. It was epic. I think she loves me. I smell wedding bells? Na fuck that, I am too young for dat shit, I still got more moshing to do before settling down, yo.

Hmmmm, I wonder if I order myself my very own This Time Next Year shirt, will that help me make out with EVEN MORE dirty as hell girls who will throw up in my mouth while we are kissing? I need to hook up with more girls who have smelly crotches. Should I try to join my college's student activities club so I can try to book This Time Next Year on my campus in the multi-purpose room?!?!?! I think that event will really draw lots of girls who have smelly crotches.

In other news, I am still depressed about not having an iPhone. Fugg you Verizon for doing this to me. Maybe when the This Time Next Year's record goes gold platinum neon whatever, they will buy me an iPhone??????

This Time Next Year sucks at two things: 1. Playing music and 2. Picking out artwork to decorate their apartment. Seriously, that painting looks like shit. If this bands music could somehow be turned into a painting, I am positive it would look just like the garbage hanging on the wall in their promo pic. That painting wouldn't go for 50 cents at a garage sale (same goes for their latest release). Just sayin'